#It's also very useful if you get tired of my posting a whole bunch of what I'm gaming about in a given day lol
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What does the acronym WPTSP mean? Maybe I'm just bad at googling but I can't seem to figure it out
That's a personal initialism, don't worry! It's not widespread, it's just a housekeeping tag - it's short for Will Plays [The Stanley Parable] :)
All of my Gameplay posts are under the WP[initials] tags! Deltarune, OFF, Phoenix Wright, etc. etc. I don't think I've ever collected them all into one place before though, it's a bit sporadic haha
#It's also very useful if you get tired of my posting a whole bunch of what I'm gaming about in a given day lol#Why Will? It's just kind of a name that's stuck#I think it started with Phoenix Wright since I thought WPPW was funny hehe#And Will is my Lawyersona's name!#I do have a gaming liveblog acc but I never use it XP#Part of why I haven't gone back and gathered them into one spot is Because it's sporadic#I don't keep a very close eye on it lol#So it would be annoying to reblog all my gaming stuff onto that sideblog#Which my brain won't let me use it properly until I do so#So it's stuck in limbo lol#Oh brain#Anyhow yes! I appreciate you trying to find it first haha sorry to have it be confusing#WPVG
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May I request a smoll eyeless jack x f reader nsfw story? Or headcanons?
eyeless jack x fem reader NSFW hcs
cw: 18+ content, medical kink, breeding kink, biting, blood, kinda disrespecting boundaries?? kinda not??, afab fem aligned reader
a/n: hey let’s all ignore my wildly different formatting for each post until i figure out wtf i’m doing lmfao. i decided to do hcs for this since i enjoy rambling and i have a couple fics already lined up and those take significantly longer for me to write!! i hope that’s okay anon, i just want to get more stuff posted :) also i threw a bunch of random ideas together for this so if you’d like anything else more specific please req again!
sooo we all know eyeless jack is a demon, right? to say dude is into some freaky shit would be an understatement.
- jack has a higher sex drive than most due to his demon tendencies. pair that with the rush he gets after a good evening of organ harvesting and you’re in for a Very Long Night. his stamina is also no joke.
- wear a short skirt? it’s getting cut off with his scalpel. accidentally slice your finger while chopping vegetables? well you better turn off the stove because he’s bending you over it. he senses you’re ovulating? he’s fucking you twice as much.
- if you’re into medical play and getting cut up with surgery tools he will be over the moon.
- if not, you’re gonna have to have a sit down talk with jack. he will do his best, but he can end up viewing you as just a lowly human at times. you’re gonna have to put your foot down sternly to fully gain his respect. he cares about your boundaries (somewhat), it just takes a minute to get through to his human side.
- on that note, don’t even dream of dominating him. he’ll laugh in your face and restrain you if the idea even crosses your mind. the thought of a weaker being telling him what to do during sex is comical to jack. he might let you ride him if he’s feeling lazy, but his clawed hands will be gripped around your waist as a silent reminder of who’s in charge.
- he’s into degradation. not the typical “you’re a whore” shit. no, this guy will take every chance to remind you that you’re just a fragile little human that’s only breathing because he lets you. if you feed into his ego, jack will reward you with his face between your thighs for hours.
- ooh let me take a moment to talk about this monster’s tongue. godly is an ironic term to describe anything involving jack but it’s the only fitting word. it’s long, slightly textured, quick and strong. he looooves to edge you until you inevitably break and the only words you can form are broken pleas. you’re gonna have to pry him off of you during your periods. he’s a little nasty
- jack will pretty much refuse to cum anywhere that isn’t inside you or your mouth. during sex, he tends to fully give into his animalistic demon qualities. meaning the only thing running through his mind is ‘breed, breed, breed.’
- big corruption kink. like MASSIVE. i think all the pastas have some form of corruption kink, but obviously the whole demon thing brings it to a new level. if you were a virgin when you met him, he’s gonna have to physically restrain himself from pouncing on you the second its brought up in conversation.
- let’s talk about positions. jack’s not really picky as long as he’s fucking your brains out but he does have a few favorites. mating press is almost always a winner since it feeds into his need to breed (i crack myself up). missionary is a classic that ensures he can have complete control. jack is also a fan of fucking on operating tables???? don’t ask me ask him, he’s odd. his least favorites involve 69, cowgirl, or pretty much anything that involves you on top of him. he doesn’t really get tired so doing all the work doesn’t bother him.
- will 100% spit in your mouth and he doesn’t care if you think it’s gross. get used to it sorry. if you’re into it then you’ve won.
- probably will throw a tantrum if he finds out you masturbated without him. he’s given you so much special attention and you still want more? well. he’s gonna fuck you so hard that you’ll be too sore to even think about touching yourself. i’m praying for you girl good luck.
- LOVES TO BITE ON YOUR CHEST AND NECK. i cannot stress this enough. and he WILL draw blood, i mean his mouth is full of sharp teeth so it’s basically a given. bro will be fucking you and straight up take a drink break FROM YOUR THROAT. be prepared to never show your neck or cleavage in public ever again. unless you’re into that. then you go girl, we’re all cheering for you.
- jack thinks it’s hilarious to say terrifying unsexy shit during sex. “i can’t wait to cut you open and eat those delicious kidneys that belong to me….” you just look at him with your mouth open. you’d be better off ignoring his annoying ass he (probably) doesn’t mean it.
#eyeless jack#eyeless jack x reader#eyeless jack x you#eyeless jack x y/n#eyeless jack smut#creepypasta smut#creepypasta#creepypasta headcanons#creepypasta x female reader#creepypasta x reader#celia reqs#eyeless jack headcanon#i refuse to abbreviate creepypasta yall are crazy for that
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Summary- one day your whole world turns upside down and where will your lives go from here
Warnings- teenagers, smut , alcohol mentions, not thoroughly proof read ( so let me know if any major errors )
A/N- please note this story is only for entertainment and not in anyway linked to what real life people mentioned in this story may do or how they may act!
SERIES MASTERLIST
9 months prior- 13th of November Lando’s birthday
Lando’s house was buzzing who knew someone could have this many friends. I guess someone whose house is big enough to fit the whole year level will invite the whole year level. But this was a bit extreme for only a 17th birthday.
I didn’t really want to be here but in order to not get bullied and love a normal teenage life I had to experience the fun sometimes so here I was surrounded by a bunch of people I don’t like at a snobby boys birthday.
I don’t drink but there had to be some form of non alcoholic drink in this house so I escaped to the kitchen to look. As I stood in front of the open fridge I felt a presence beside me and then I saw him.
“ you good rummaging through my fridge “
“ maybe if you put some actual drinks out not just pure alcohol I wouldn’t have to”
“ you’re at a party sweetheart” he laughed
“I’m 17” I snapped
“Me too” he grinned
“ none of use are allowed to be drinking and if we are drinking you should have a parental note”
“Ok now you have really brought the mood down”
“ why are you talking to me anyway lando? ” I sighed
“ just doing what I’m supposed to greeting my guests and stopping them from going through my stuff” Lando closed the fridge door and turned to the kitchen counter pouring liquid from a clear jug into a red solo cup.Before he walked over and handed it out to me
“ what’s that?”
“ trust me, its lemonade” I take the cup and sniff it. It’s actually lemonade.
“ I didn’t forget about people like you” he smiled before walking away and going back to his friends
The night continued after my encounter with Lando Norris. My friends gossiped on the couches outside, we ate lots of food, danced, of course took the famous mirror selfies that would be posted on instagram later and the main event the cake.
The party was winding down and not many people were left anymore, I had to wait for Mad’s to finish her partying before leaving and she was having way too much fun with a particular person to be leaving anytime soon. So her I was sat on the couch in Lando’s living room.
“ your still here , abit pat your bed time I thought” and he was back , this time sitting next to me.
“ I have to wait for my friends otherwise yes I would be in bed” I kept my eyes straight ahead
“ well want to pass the time then” I looked at him confused
“ with what?” I asked
He simply just picked up the Nintendo controller and handed it to me
“Mario?” He suggested
“ what is it with you and your karting don’t you ever do anything else?” Still I did take the controller, I didn’t have anything better to do.
“ no I don’t “ he turned the TV on and started up the game. I was not nearly as professional as him, he took Mario kart very seriously but never the less it was still actually really fun, I didn’t know he could be so easy to be around.
I would say we had been playing for a good 30mins before I got bored of Mario Kart because Lando could never got bored of it.
“ what should we do now” he asked. He wasn’t tired? He wasn’t done spending time with me?
“ How about I go find my friend cause it’s getting really late” I laughed
“ how about I kiss you” my eyebrows shot up, what. Say something , do something.
My ears must be deceiving me because there is no way he just said that to me.
“W-What?” I breathed out
“ you heard me”
“ did I? “ I asked softly
“ you did , I know you did and I also know you didn’t laugh and walk away”
Why didn’t I walk away, maybe I wanted to kiss him, maybe I wanted him to kiss me….
Ok I want him to kiss me!
I just lean in and somehow our lips are touching. They are also doing a lot more than touching, I’m actually kissing Lando Norris.
His left hand comes up to grab my jaw and pull me closer and my arms wrap around his shoulders. There’s no way this is actually happening someone better pinch me because it’s getting to good.
Then he stops.
“ come to my room” no NO NO walk away this cannot be good.
But I don’t want to walk away.
“ Or do you like everyone looking at us” he continues. It’s only then that I realise we are still in the living room and even if there is only a handful of guests left it still makes me feel awkward.
“ ok” is all I whisper out before he grabs my hand and takes my upstairs.
His room was surprisingly clean and neat, although it was still cluttered with karting posters , trophies and helmets. It was actually a nice room to be in.
Lando shut the door behind us before turning back around to me
“I’m gonna kiss you again “ he smiled
And I let him. Let’s just say I was about to let him do a lot of things.
I ended up laying in the middle of his double bed in nothing but my bra and underwear as he hovered over me.
“ you sure this is what you want?” He tucked abit of hair behind my head.
“ I’ve never done this before” I replied
“ that’s why I want you to be sure” he didn’t want to push me and I respected that
“ I’m sure, positive , this is what I want”
He only smiled and then leant down catching my lips before trailing down my body.
This is what I wanted, who knows what would happen after this but I know that this is where I wanted to be and who I wanted to be with.
A/N- just so you know I won’t be going to hard with any sexual or smut scenes until both characters turn 18 which in the story isn’t that far away! But when I do put out more smut scenes please note you can feel free to skip past them as the story can still make sense if you skip them. Anyway hope your enjoying
taglist: comment below to be added
@barcelonaloverf1life@harrysdimple05@hc-dutch@formula1mount@itsbwokenln4 @phantomxoxo @dorothea47 @emmaweasley @joannamuns9n @alexisquinnlee-bc @g3org1al33 @ladyoflynx
#f1 x reader#x reader#fanfic#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc x you#lando norris x reader#imagine#pierre gasly x reader#lando norris#lando norris fanfic#f1 fandom#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 fic#lando norris imagine#lando x reader#lando imagine#lando x you
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Tim Drake: Ugly Duckling (dp x dc)
So this is the last day of pride month, and so also the last day of me trying to write as many LGBTQ+ canon dc characters. It’s been fun (and I got to read a whole bunch of comics which was actually much more fun than the first time I’d tried to read those!!)
Now even though this is the end of June, feel free to send an ask if you want me to write a blurb with any character. I make no promises, but I will very much try! (It might take a while especially if I’m in a Tumblr hibernation phase.)
Anyways, for the last day of pride month I wanted to do Tim Drake coz he’s dc’s main “it” gay girl. I’ve been working on this Dead Tired fic for ages, based on the post about Tim getting turned into a swan and meeting Danny, who as a prince has to give him a kiss to change him back (I can’t find the prompt but it was hilarious so this was my take on it).
Here’s the beginning of the fic:
Red Robin was on patrol duty, while Batman and Robin were following a lead on possible joker safehouses. All in all, It was a pretty quiet night with only two muggings, both low-energy as both perpetrator ran away as soon as a bat-shaped shadow moved.
So Red Robin had spent most of the night chatting with Babs. He was grappling around town, as they started on the new date app they’d both found out Jason was using.
“I told him he can’t put only photos of his motorcycle but- wait I’m getting a call,” Oracle interrupted herself. Tim waited before the earpiece came to life again.
“Sorry to cut this short Red Robin, got a full-attention request from Canary. If you need anything, beep me, and Keep your coms open.”
“Bye, Oracle,” he said, and like that, Red Robin was alone once again.
He stopped on Grand Avenue Station and just let himself take in Gotham. The city was beautiful at night, and Tim was itching for a camera. He seen hundreds of pictures of the city’s skyline but they always managed to be unique. The night sky may always be covered by dark clouds above, but Gotham had its own stars in the lights shinning on top of the skyscrapers. So lost in his thoughts, Tim was, he almost missed the soft noise that sounded behind him. The voice that sounded behind him was harder to miss.
“Wither away so late, Little Red Bird?”
Red Robin turned to see a tall woman standing half in the shadows
“Sorry, can I help you?” Answered the vigilante despite the bad feeling creeping up to him.
“I’d like to know where I can find your guardian,” the woman said, still in the shadows.
“You mean Batman?” He chanced.
The woman nodded and Tim resisted the urge to sigh.If this was another one of Bruce’s ill-advised fling, Tim was going to hack every electronic device the man had to play sex-eds on loops for at least a week.
“He’s busy at the moment.” Then feeling like he shouldn’t assume what the woman wanted Bruce for, he continued. “But if you need any help, I’ll do my best.”
The woman stepped forward, and Tim could see her better. Her face was bare, but her distinctive outfit seemed to indicate she was some kind of vigilante-slash-criminal. The outfit did, in fact, ring a bell in the back of his mind, but it was dim. Tim didn’t tense up, but he did angle his body in a way to accommodate for a better escape through grappling. She continued walking until she was within arm’s reach of Tim, towering over him. She extended a hand to lightly caress his cheek, and Tim went still at the touch.
“Such a kind Little Bird you are,” she said gently. “You know, you remind me of my daughter.” She sighed. “Oh, what pretty children you both are.”
“Thank you,” said Tim as he sidestepped out of the way. “I’m sure she’s a lovely person.”
“Oh she was,” the woman said and through his growing wariness, Tim spared a thought for the girl. “She had dark hair and the fairest skin, just like you. The most beautiful girl in the land some would even say.”
That niggling feeling came back as a feeling of familiarity poked at him once again. “You must’ve been very proud.”
The woman let out an airy laugh before saying playfully/contemplating. “mustn’t I?”
A shiver ran down his back. Alright, there was something wrong with this woman, and Tim wasn’t waiting around to find out what. Not without any information or backup.
“Well, if there’s nothing I can do for you, I really have to get going,” Tim said as he took out his grapple gun. In a second, the gun was ripped from his hand , and he was slammed to the side of the staircase leading up to the roof. He let out a gasp at the impact and his features tensed in pain. The woman hadn’t even touched him.
“Not so fast, Little Bird. We don’t want you going back to the Batman just yet. I’m not ready to make him my Knight yet.”
“Your knight?” Tim managed to get out. He tried to move his arms, but some unseen force was pinning him in place. Shit, that meant he couldn’t reach the comm to send out a distress signal. Hopefully Babs would check in soon.
The woman smiled as she approached him once again. “What better for a Queen, than a Dark Knight?”
And just like that it clicked. “You’re the Queen of Fables.”
“Well look at this, you’ve got the brains and the beauty,” she teased, her voice as smooth as honey.
“What do you want with Batman?” Tim asked though he could guess from previous encounters she had had with the Justice League that the villainess wanted to turn Bruce into a fairytale character of some sort. She’d done the trick on Clark, and twice on Diana, so it was probably Batman’s turn now. So, yes, Tim could guess, But the longer he kept her talking the more time he had to figure out a way out of this.
“I told you, he’ll be a Knight of the Queen,” She extended a hand and tilted Tim’s face up. “Do you know what that would make you Little Bird?”
Most villains assumed the batclan worked like a crime family. So the family of a knight? “Nobility,” Tim guessed, unsure where this was going.
“Exactly.” She smiled, and then she moved. Tim braced for the hit.
Instead of a punch though, he only felt a tingling sensation. Cautiously, he opened his eyes, only for them to grow bigger as he took in his uniform. Or the lack thereof.
He was in something-century clothing, in some sort of frilly shirt and pants, all in white. This was worse than a punch. Then, as the thought hit him, Tim’s hands flew to his face only to come in contact with the silky fabric of a masquerade mask. He sighed in relief, and as he calmed down, he realized he was now free of the force pinning him down.
“The color is for my daughter,” the Queen said. Then, she let her head fall to the side before tracing a line across his forehead and Tim could feel something like a circlet setting down on it. “There you go. Now, it’s perfect. You could practically be siblings.”
“No thanks.,” Tim answered.
The Queen tsked him. “That’s no way to behave Little Bird, has nobody taught you to say thank you when you receive a gift.”
“I don’t want anything from you,” Tim disagreed mildly as he took stock of his weapons. Everything was gone, including the earpiece, which meant Babs had to have been alerted and someone was en route.
The Queen frowned. “I was going to be merciful, for you guardian’s sake, but I no longer feel generous.” She raised her hand and Tim tried to roll away, but the magic beam swerved and hit him in a blinding flash of light.
When he managed to open his eyes once again, the world seemed quite a bit bigger than it had been moments before.
“What did you do to me?” He said. Or tried to say.
Instead a strange squawk echoed and Tim took a step back in surprise. However, he lost his balance and started to fall and as he tried to catch himself with his hand, two large white wings unfolded. He dropped down, which wasn’t as far as he would’ve estimated and laid stiff. He moved his left arm, and a white wing followed suit.
Oh, no. Oh no no no.
A grating laugh interrupted his freak out. “There you are my pretty Little Bird, all better. White really is your colour, don’t you th-“
With a loud hiss, Tim propelled himself towards the woman. Making use of his newfound beak, he pecked and bit everything he could, as he flapped his wings.
“Blasted creature- Get off! Stop it, you despicable, puny-“
Finally she managed to grab Tim and throw him away from her. He landed with a squawk, but managed to get himself back to his feet quickly. “You little/awful brat,” she snarled. “You’ll pay for this!”
But as the Queen threw out her hand, something rippled in the air between them and the magic beam seem to explode midway into a green vortex. Tim’s clumsy attempt at waddling away had him head straight towards it, and it was in vain that he tried to redirect the course. She and Tim made eye contact as the swan-boy tipped right into the swirling green vortex, both of their eyes wide-open in surprise.
Danny was exhausted. He was currently on week one of the full month of Royal Duties he’d promised Clockwork. Being Prince of the Infinite Realm was not all that it was cracked up to be, and that was saying a lot since he had already been expecting it to be awful.
When Clockwork had made the request, Danny had proceeded to freak out about his new status, and then tried to abdicate. It was only the master of time reminding him of all the terrible possible candidate for the throne per rites of combat (such as Vlad) that stopped him from washing his hands of this mess. And now Danny was forced to spend one whole month of his summer vacation in the Ghost Zone to fulfill his duty as a Prince.
He thought it would be some paperwork, maybe a battle or two, nothing too bad, but nooo. Because, of course nothing was easy, Danny had to show up at Events, and be Diplomatic. It was meeting, after meeting, after weird parties that were a mix between Medieval Banquets and Debutante balls.
And worse of all were the marriage proposals. Danny could sorta understand, marrying into royalty was a definite plus for a lot of more powerful ghosts but when they called him a half-breed behind his back, only to smile in his face with a marriage contract in one hand and flowers in the other, that was where he drew the line.
Plus there was also the fact that he was, like sixteen.
Suffice to say, Danny was exhausted and hiding out in Pariah Dark’s old castle as a last resort. It wasn’t his favorite place all in all, but the gardens were absolutely beautiful, which was where he was walking. He was currently headed to the hedge maze, since it was the best way to get rid of any tails he may or may not have.
The maze was nasty if it didn’t like you, and it didn’t like anybody but Danny, and even then, it still tried to take a bite every once in a while. Despite the snaking vines and roots trying to capture anything that moved, the flowers that wailed softly when disturbed or the sharp thorns of the hedge plants themselves, it was still a beautiful place. Uniquely, the closer you got to the centre, the more colorful (and dangerous) everything got, which was why he liked it best.
He reached the centre much quicker than the first time he tried, thanks to the maze actually helping him, and something pale caught his eye right in the middle of the open area, right next to the bench Danny loved to use. As he got closer, he realized it was a swan laying on the floor, seemingly unconscious.
“Oh no,” Danny said as he approached. “What happened to you?”
As if awakened by the sound of his voice, the swan started to shift, its wings twitching and it rose its head groggily. As soon as it clocked in Danny, it let out a surprised squawk, followed by a long hiss as it struggled to move away.
“Hey, hey, none of that, Duckie, you’re ok.” Danny raised his hands placatingly. “I don’t want to harm you, ok? I just want to make sure you’re ok.”
The hiss subsided by a bit, but that may have only be due to the swan managing to get further away.
“Sh, sh, it’s ok,” Danny repeated as he slowly inched forward. The swan stopped hissing but still observed him warily. “I don’t want to hurt you Duckie, but I do think we’d better get you out of this maze.”
Danny took another step, and this time the swan stayed still. “How about bringing you back to my rooms just for now.” The swan hissed louder at the statement. “Don’t worry Duckie, I’m not keeping you prisoner it’s just this maze has been known to eat people. And you’re too pretty to be eaten,” Danny flashed a smile at the swan which had it stare back with a gaze saying really?
“So what do you say, wanna crash at my place?” Danny asked. The swan didn’t move forward but he didn’t move away either.
“Yeah, I wouldn’t trust a guy who talks to birds either,” Danny allowed. “And the place where I’m staying is a little gloomy, so I don’t blame you, but I can’t leave you here. The maze is honestly really dangerous, especially for a nice bird is like you. “
The swan seemed to hesitate before it hesitantly made its way to Danny. Ghost animals were usually smart but the swan seemed to understand English, which made communicating that much easier. Danny smiled and opened his arms. “I can carry you.” The swan just looked at him, with what Danny would’ve thought was a deadpan stare. “It would go much faster.”
If the swan was human it probably would’ve sighed, but instead, its wings just fell a little before it waddled towards Danny and looked up as if to say ‘get on with it’.
Danny smiled and gathered the animal in his arms. “Buckle up,” he said before flying off towards the maze exit, which was accompanied by a low hiss. Making sure there was nobody there to ambush him, Danny made it back to the castle in record time.
“Here we are Duckie.” Danny set the swan back down and it plopped down on the ground and just steadied themselves for a while.
Tim was a swan. He had wings and no fingers, and his feet were webbed.
He was handling it though. By which Tim meant he was shelving the impending panic attack for later when he wasn’t stuck in a swan body.
Ok, so he’d been turned by the Queen of Fables, so there had to be an answer in a fairytale,a way to make him normal again. He knew the ugly duckling story. That had a swan in it, right? He didnt know any other swan stories, except maybe as a dish during the wedding banquet of whichever princess. He vaguely remembered a Barbie movie that had passed on the TV when he was younger but the only thing that came to mind were a scary-looking Troll thing, and ballet. So with lack of better alternatives he was going to go with the ugly duckling. The ugly duckling’s happy ending was reuniting with family, so maybe all he needed was to make his way back to Gotham.
“Are you ok?”
And that was another thing. The guy. The one Tim had at first wanted to get away from. He seemed nice and all, but he also had neon green eyes, and fangs. Unfortunately, while they suited the boy very well, they also marked him as an unknown.
On the other hand, if the glowing portal wasn’t enough of an indication, the green tinge of everything around was clear indicator that Tim wasn’t in Kansas anymore. The guy seemed to want to help him, and having an ally wherever he was could only help.
Tim nodded as best as he could with his long weird neck, and he had to take a few steps to regain balance.
“That’s good,” the boy smiled with his white pointy canine. “How did you end up in the middle of that maze?”
Tim just looks back tiredly. He didn’t know how to even try and explain when he couldn’t say a word and had no opposable thumbs.
“Yeah, sorry.” The boy winced. “Maybe stick to yes or no questions.”
There was a sharp knock at the door that had the boy turning away.
“Prince Phantom!” A voice rung through the door.
Prince?
The newly-dubbed Prince Phantom got up to open the door, “yes, what can I do for you?”
“Your meeting with Queen Dora is approaching. Do you still prefer to forgo an escort guards?” a purple lady was saying.
“I’ll be fine without, Maj but thank you very much,” Phantom answered with a polite smile.
“I’ll pass it along, my Prince.” She bowed and closed the doors behind her.
Phantom walked back to lay on the bed with a sigh. “I really hate that they call me that.” He turned towards Tim to continue. “I bet swans don’t have royalty. You guys had the right idea.”
#Yep so this is the beginning beginning#Tim drake#danny fenton#dead tired#dc x dp#dp x dc#roxpox#roxpoxwrote#bisexual character
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How I lost 13 kgs/ 28lbs in 1 month!! (73-60kg/160-132lbs)
First of all I’d like to say that this will vary from person to person but it was a lot easier to lose weight at a higher SW.
My daily routine:
I would wake up at 6am and get ready for school and leave at 7am. I’d weigh in every 2-3 days and log it on this app which is the cutest ever for tracking WL.
I’d fast for about 18- 20 hours (starting at midnight). Which would be a lot easier to do at school as I’m not at home so close to my kitchen LOL.
Throughout the day I’d sip on water or black coffee. I highly recommend getting a big water bottle no matter how ridiculous it looks as I found it easier to curb cravings with a whole bunch of water nearby to fill my stomach up.
Chewing gum daily helps to reduce cravings and keep your mouth occupied. It also makes food taste weird once you’re done with it so that prevented me from eating.
As soon as I got home (around 3pm) I’d make myself a cup of coffee and smoke a cigarette (you don’t have to smoke obvi, I’m not promoting in any way) but the coffee would help me stay awake and give me a little energy.
From there id either take a nap or keep myself busy with homework/ projects. If I didn’t have anything to do I’d crochet or practice my Korean or Arabic. Picking up new, easy hobbies helps to keep busy.
I went to the gym at around 6pm where I’d do cardio for 5 days out of the week and rest days on weekends (walking on the treadmill at speed 4.1 at a 5 incline)
At around 8pm I’d have a small meal, usually steamed/ air fried vegetables and some sort of protein. One of my favorite meals was air fried sweet potatoes and an air fried chicken breast where I’d add a bit of salt and pepper.
I’d then shower, organise my school stuff and go to bed at around 10.
To distract myself during times when I was too tired to do work or didn’t want to sleep I’d just be doomscrolling on edblr/ edtwt to mass consume ED media to motivate/ keep me on track to distract myself from binging. After I’d take a nap and I would wake up and not be very hungry and if I was I’d chug a shit-ton of water.
Please note that smoking or vaping does not curb hunger cravings and is a bit of an unnecessary addiction. I smoke just to keep myself occupied for a while and distract myself from food but I 100% don’t recommend starting or using it as I do IF YOU DONT ALREADY DO IT.
That’s all I can think of for now but please feel free to leave requests for any inspo or posts you’d like to see from me!!
#tw ana bløg#tw restriction#3d relapse#light as a feather#low cal restriction#not actually pro just using tags#⭐️vation goals#anor3cla#tw ed ana#tw ana rant#tw ana mia#anorecyc#anoreksik#ana y mia#tw mia#tw 3d vent#ed but not ed sheeran#tw edtwt#ed blogg#ed bløg#thinspø#tw thinspi#thinsperation#thinspiraton#fatsp0#3d not sheeran#pro ans#proannna#proan4#notpr0justtags
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✨ISAT Sky: Cotl!AU Q&A (22-09)✨
Welcome to the Q&A! A space where I can answer related or similar question about the ISAT Sky: Cotl!AU! If you submitted your ask anonimously, then you’ll have to check the whole post if it’s answered here, if it’s not, worry not! Your asks might have been used for a future comic or just in the queue~
Anonimo ha chiesto:Hey your ISAT Sky: COTL crossover comic is what got me to try out sky, it's pretty fun even if players approaching me is a bit intimidating for my socially anxious self. The comic itself is pretty nice too and thank you for getting me into such a cute looking game :3
Thank you so much!!!♥️♥️♥️ sky is wonderful, it became my personal happy place!
@lunarmoff ha chiesto: Hello!! Hi, you probably have a lot of asks in your box but I wanted to thank you for getting me into isat! I first read your Isat sky au when I was in the sky fandom and I loved it even though I didn't know the characters at all! Now that I've gotten into the fandom and gotten to know the characters, I understand your au a lot more now. I love your art style and how you added a bunch of peoples sky kids into your story! I myself would have given you my sky kid but I found your comic a little to late to give them to you. Just know that I love your comic, and I can't wait to see how it ends!!!
AAAAAhhhhh that's awesome!!!So gad that you like ISAT! It's an emotional rollercoaster but it's soooo good!
@a-tired-human-draws-junk ha chiesto: I've been reading ur sky cotl x isat au and its driving me NUTS isat is a newer brainrot for me and sky is an OLD one like I havent played sky properly in over a year and you dragged me back into the game w ur comics DURING THE SEASON OF DUETS and I've been playing daily so I can get stuff AND I CANT BELIEVE AN ISAT AU IS WHAT DRAGGED ME BACK TO CANDLERUNNING HELL /lhj Anyways love the sky cotl x isat comics I see siffrin is still an idiot (Also I cant stop imagine siffrin honking at his family like a goddamn excited moth while running around them goofily as per average sky kid interaction and the mental image is so funny)
ASDFGHJKL YOU CAN'T UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH I NEED SIFFRIN TO JUST- ACT LIKE A GOOFY EXCITED AND INNOCENT SKY KID AGAIN. HE'S JUST A LITTLE GUY!!!! HE DESERVE ALL THE HAPPYNESS AND FLUFF IN THE WORLD AND I'M HERE TO GIVE IT TO HIM (after I made him suffer hell of course)
@o-rainknight-o ha chiesto:I just want you to know that I love your art! It's so beautiful!Your LMK AU is amazing. I haven't played Sky in a while and I've never played ISAT but my sister has, so I know a little about it. It's also very pretty the way you draw it.Make sure not to overwork yourself too! We are all strangers here but a lot of us care :)
Ty!!!! I hope you get the chance to play sky as well!
@scarftale-bryan ha chiesto: Why did the lads skip the plains and wasteland?
cause I don't have the time or will to draw all 6 the realms. And also cause geographically, I don't know where the wastelands could be placed in Guadeloupe
Anonimo ha chiesto:
crying wailing throwing up over isat cotl i love it so much
AAAHH TY!!!
@puppetxtheatre ha chiesto: I don't even like sky but your comic was so good it convinced me to play ISAT and now I'm in love with the game thank you
WELCOME TO YOUR NEW HELL/pos
Anonimo ha chiesto: is it bad that i keep tricking myself into believing your isat comics are canon?
omg I myself have to do it otherwise I would just go insane over the fact we will never have comfirmation to what happened to the forgotten island
Anonimo ha chiesto:I don't know anything about children of the sky (is that the name???) but I really like ISAT and I ADORE your comic. I'm so pumped to see all them colors and pretty stuff in your awesome style
Thank you! Me as well omg you have no idea (even though then panels will take double the time to color
@kestrel-bee ha chiesto: Hihi!
I’m loving your Shadowpeach AU, loving the current angst :]
but when going through your profile I saw your ISAT x COTL AU, which reminded me of the fact that I’d been intending to buy ISAT for a long while, so I finally did.
That was yesterday and I am now 6hrs in. Thank you for the new hyperfixation material 🙏
LMAO THAT WAS ME. THE FUCK (I finished the game in 3 days.)
Anonimo ha chiesto:I would just like to say I am in LOVE with the way you draw the sky kids! This is making me inspired to draw my sky kid!!
Thank you!!!
@sunsetcannon ha chiesto: Considering I am both an ISAT fan and a Sky fan I'm going to be permanently rotating this AU in my head like it's a microwave so thank you for that
And I need you to know that unfortunately you'll remain in said microwave for a lot more/pos
@selfdestructivecat ha chiesto: Hello! I have a question about your ISAT: COTL AU comic! So Nesting guide was there! Does that mean that Season of Nesting had already happened in this universe? Presumably Season of Revival will be happening once the dust has settled on this comic and everyone works on restoring Aviary Village, so does that mean that Revival happens after Nesting in this timeline? And will Duets, the most recent season, also have happened before Revival? (I’m just very happy because now my skid, a nesting moth, canonically can exist in this au! XD)
You can find the timeline of the AU here!
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disclaimer: this is the inside of my brain so if you think different then that’s great! this is just to be silly / i’m procrastinating life, so we’re chill 😎
hogwarts legacy modern au: music headcanons
characters included: shadow trio, poppy, imelda, garreth, natsai, anne, also blurb about leander (ily lee but i was tired of editing)
sebastian sallow
Sebastian is that one insufferable guy (love him). He’s moody as hell and he uses music as a form of processing (im self inserting rn). A lot of his top music is reflective of what he’s going through. For the most part he’s into indie rock and alt rock, but if there’s a song that he can even sort of relate to then he’s all over it. He thinks he’s brooding, he’s edgy, he’s angsty. We all know he made 2014 tumblr his BITCH. And he has NOOO IDEA how ABBA ended up in his top 5. He’ll say it was Ominis. He’ll say he was hacked. (his fav ABBA song is Lay All Your Love On Me)
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ominis gaunt
Ominis wears his headphones everywhere, listening to some of the most beautiful music but also the most devastating music. He likes a genre to his music that gives off a certain ���guys i SWEAR im fine haha..” vibe to the function. he’s nostalgic, he’s yearnful, he’s emotionally very connected to music and is one of those people that will cry when a song is really good (me too) (he’ll swallow the lump down, just know he’s feelin it). aside from his top artists he also listens to a bunch of instrumentals when he’s studying. we all know he plays the piano. yes Merry Christmas, Please Don’t Call by Bleachers is secretly about Sebastian (tea). yes She’s Always a Woman by Billy Joel is secretly ab my MC (TEAA!). yes ABBA is there on purpose! this man knows every lyric to Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!
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ella collins (OC/MC)
Ella really just wants to live in a cottage and be a fairy but she’s also just a girl. she has a song associated to every person she’s ever had a crush on and any person that’s ever done her wrong. she has a playlist for that one guy. she’s posting a screenshot of the song she’s listening to on her story for one person to watch. when she’s feeling petty she sends Sebastian songs DIRECTLY cause she’s mad at him. 4/5 of these songs are about him i fear. she loves music because she never has to get over anything. grudges are timeless. she’s crazy and this is a self insert.
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garreth weasley
#GiveGarreththeAux (Garreth wrote this). Garreth is a vibes guy and will defend those vibes with his whole chest. “How can you not like this song? Just say you hate me! High School Musical soundtrack is top tier. Kate Bush is a legend. Hozier is a wizard, have you seen his hair? I want his hair.” He’s fun as hell. Car rides with him are never boring, and as much as he loves his music he wants to hear your music cause he just wants to listen to everything. doesn’t care where the music came from. if he likes it he likes it. gotta party with this guy.
(Noah Kahan is his top artist bc even tho he’s a vibes guy, he has such a heart. peep My False Confidence. ily Garreth.)
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natsai onai
Natsai’s minutes listened is the lowest because she’s too busy dismantling the patriarchy and abolishing the system to listen most of the time. She grew up in the Katniss Everdeen generation. There’s not one man vocalist on her playlist because doesn’t really care what they have to say. She’s not super picky about the genre but listening to guitar riffs makes her feel like she’s ascending and so she loves that shit. She begged her mom to let her go to a Paramore concert when she was twelve and she has band posters covering her walls from corner to corner. She knows musical theory because duh. I love her.
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anne sallow
personally i HC as the coolest girl alive. she’s friends with literally everyone. if she smiles at you you think the world is spinning solely for her. she’s just effortlessly that girl. and even tho she seems sweet and a little quiet let it be known she is absolutely BLASTING hypercore or glitchpop or some stuff like that in her headphones. she just likes the way music sounds, she doesn’t GAF what they’re saying. she just wants her brain to go bzzzzzzz. my girl!!! (her and garreth are actually LETHAL at parties. like banger for banger, they’re besties. if they’re throwing a party you WANT to be there) (her and Natsai are fangirling about imogen heap bc she’s a musical genius)
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poppy sweeting
Poppy my love. I see you. I hear you. I love you and all your big emotions. she’s dissecting lyrics like it’s no one’s business. In another life somewhere she’s an English and Psychology double major. she’s telling me what a metaphor is and im listening because I’ll listen to anything she says. she’s telling me her attachment style is anxious and yk what hell yeah me too please don’t leave me. every song she listens to serves a purpose. her and garreth have gone to five different shows to see Noah Kahan and Lizzy McAlpine together. The Louvre is about Imelda. GODDD The Louvre is about Imelda. my heart.
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imelda reyes
Imelda is the manifesting queen. she is a confident queen. she’s cool as hell. she seems mean at first glance but that’s only because she is locked TF in. between her million high level classes, every sport she’s plays, and her social life— she has to be focused. she needs music that will put her in the headspace. her top 5 songs are naturally on her ‘pregame’ playlist that she plays before every game (with the exception of #4. she’s pregaming therapy with that one). shes gonna graduate top of her class and go pro at some sport and no one is gonna be surprised. you go girlfriend. my girlfriend.
honorable mention: Leander is THE rock man, specifically acid/psychedelic rock. He’s shaking his head and playing air guitar. he’s asking his parents to get him a drum set for Christmas still. He thinks he would’ve been asked to join The Beatles if they were still a band. big big fan.
to everyone that talked through this with me either messaging or on the og post, thank you 💚 @mrsgoofygracie your wonderful ABBA sebinis theory is now cemented in my silly post
#hogwarts legacy#sebastian sallow#hogwarts legacy mc#ominis gaunt#imelda reyes#anne sallow#poppy sweeting#natsai onai#garreth weasley#leander prewett#hogwarts legacy headcanons#hogwarts legacy modern au
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On Mental Health and Cosmic Embarrassment
I don't usually make a post in the aftermath of one of my spirals, so I bet most people see some of the vent posts I make, and assume I am just off my meds or something. I am on them but I might not be on the right ones. This is a thing that happens to me sometimes. I have psychotic episodes, where it feels like the things I am saying are completely inconsequential and I genuinely believe no one cares what I'm saying or, worst of all, that it cannot scare anyone that cares about me. I get too tired to fight my intrusive thoughts and I just ride them out. Most of my thoughts are not ones I enjoy having. I have trouble parsing what is real sometimes. For most of my life, out of a kind of primal shame and terror of being perceived or judged, I beat myself into believing that I just roleplayed as a crazy person online because I wanted attention for it, but it finally clicked for me at some point in my 20s that I was, and am, genuinely very mentally ill, maybe in ways that make me not-entirely-functional in the culture I inhabit. Also, I want attention for it.
Life is very embarrassing. I think embarrassment, shame, et al. is probably the most cosmic feeling of them all, because being embarrassed, for me anyway, leads invariably to my OCD extrapolating the embarrassment, no matter how slight, into its natural extreme, becoming a full-blown existential meltdown and often manifesting in some self-punishment. Or a lot of self-punishment. Instead of saying "everyone wants attention, it's not a big deal", my brain will overwhelm me with shame and make me vow to be quieter about the whole thing next time. Good emotions are meant to be expressed, I tell myself, and Bad ones are not. I think it's very unhealthy for people to not express their negative emotions openly. Or maybe I'm psychotic. I mean, I am psychotic. But maybe right now, too.
Ultimately this feeling peaks with the realization - again - that I'm a eukaryote. I live on a spinning ball of stardust in the aftermath of what had to have been a colossal disaster and waste of time. But it happened, and so now there's a bunch of stuff floating around, and some of that stuff started moving for reasons I don't personally understand and the implications of which scare me. And the moving stuff that moved faster got to stay moving longer. And so a chain reaction escalated, and eventually there were very large moving things whose survival adaptations had evolved in such a way that they could conceptualize and communicate complex information about the world around them, but they were also able to conceptualize themselves. This gave them a lot of grief. They wanted very badly for there to be an answer to why they were able to do that. Surely it served some purpose. But we never found one, and here we are.
I don't have a god to turn to. I have tried - earnestly, sincerely, and desperately - to reach out; I never hear back. I don't want to be an atheist, it's heartbreaking. Honestly. I want someone to be up there, or out there. Knowing there isn't, is just... cruel. It's horrifying and it wrenches my heart. Look at us, look how much we're suffering, where the fuck did you go, what the fuck is your problem? Help us!
In spite of everything, I am still not sure what I believe.
Don't you ever just cry about the world? Like, broadly? Don't you ever just have to take off your glasses and wipe the brine from them because you caught a glimpse of what people, as a species, could be capable of? And I get angry at myself, too. What am I doing about it? What even can I do? I can barely hold down a job. I am barely an adult. I am often mired in this feeling. It permeates everything. I'm living in a tragedy - not just my own, but millions and millions of others'. This is a nightmare. It's a nightmare and I'm an embarrassment, and my brain doesn't work right, and I'm living in a terrible reality that is shared by everyone, and yet somehow equally isolating and alienating to all of us. Does it have to be that way? Aren't we all lonely?
When I am spiraling I really do think that the end is near, either for me, or for everyone, or for both. To be fair, my confidence about humanity's future is not promising even when I am at my most sane. But in this kind of emotional place, the stakes are too high for me to care that what I say might come off as upsetting. It is completely overwhelming. I see my life up to this point, and I see how long I've been alive and realize I'm very Not Normal and I look and sound different than everyone around me and I'm an embarrassment. It's embarrassing to exist. It's embarrassing to be transgender, too. It's really, really embarrassing to be mentally ill and fully aware of it all the time. It's shameful. I am ashamed of how my family likely sees me. How my peers see me. I'm just a walking disaster. I feel like this bars me from leading a happy life or finding some success in art - It doesn't seem like you're allowed to be quite this much of a problem and "get away with it", does it? There's a bit of social sanitizing at work there - you are only allowed to be a certain level of messed up and if you pass that you're sort of a pariah. I don't think I've ever done anything pariah-worthy, but I can only see things from the inside of my own head, and there's a lot of unwanted noise in here.
I painted this when I lived in Oregon. I don't know how. I could not do art like this again if asked.
I'm not in a good place, generally-speaking. It could be worse - and it was for a long time- but it's still just not great. The main reason is that I am very homesick. I grew attached to the Pacific Northwest in a way I've never really grown attached to any other place. It had a quality that exists nowhere else. It resonated with me immediately and I knew right away from the moment I first set foot there that it was my home. I grew to be a part of it, and it's the only place I felt I somewhat-belonged... I have been away from Oregon for 2 whole years as of next month. I feel like I'm a fish out of water, or a sapling in the wrong soil. I can't and won't say that the place I live currently is a bad place, but it isn't my place, and the disconnect has been maybe the nastiest shock to my system in all my life. Finding the place I loved, and living for over 12 years there, only to be wrenched away from it so suddenly, left a shock on me that I think has yet to surface in my work. I'm excited to see what form it takes when it does. Location is very important to my mental wellbeing, more than I think it is for most people. Maybe I am a plant. It's also very important for my art. I've struggled to find inspiration since I moved here. That said, I've had the very precious opportunity to just work on myself - on my transition, as well as my personal issues. I think I'm getting better, gradually, in some way. I have a job now, at least. So it's not entirely bad. I even grew sunflowers last summer.
Around this time I got banned from twitter, but I don't feel any shame about the reason why because I believe in my message. But it forced me to be a lot less active online for a long time. It also made me lose a lot of support. That's been something I've grappled with a lot these last 2 years - that people really don't like people like me, for reasons that are mostly not our fault. I will likely always be something of an outsider for being who I am now, but I was one before anyway. It's still worth it. I like the person I'm becoming. I feel like only recently did I allow myself to feel this self-love. I was too embarrassed of myself. It took a lot of patience and a lot of de-tangling my self-worth from a lot of trauma. So it's likely I would have needed to go through all of this regardless of where I was.
I still slip up. It's an uphill climb and it's slippery. I like to be transparent about these things. It's a relief - feeling like I need to hide things is my default state and it's lovely to just let go of stuff so I don't need to keep it in my head all the time. I have a lot of hangups still. I get discouraged about my art still - I fear I'll never build myself back up to where I was before, and that there will never be a time when I can really pay the bills with it. Or worse-still, that it just isn't special enough to last. That it isn't remarkable enough to survive after I'm gone. But I think a lot of people who make stuff feel that way, and it's not our fault. There's some relief in that. I'm happy to have even a few people that care about me and my work, and something I've been trying really hard to remember in recent years is to take time to appreciate them. I'm not actually alone. I have a lot of people that love me. I'm not an outsider. I'm very lucky to know the people I do, and I hold a deep regret for all the connections I've let go of because I was just too sick. Deep down I really do wish I could love everyone. I have no ill will towards anyone, not really.
I still don't know what I'm doing. I am just doing my best, I think. I'm really, really tired. I don't want to get any older. I'm scared of the passage of time. My memory is so bad, it feels like time is taken from me without me realizing. I am 33 years old. I do not have 33 years worth of memories. There are huge leaps. Gaps where suddenly I was just older and in more pain. Being adrift in time like this is horrific - one day I will blink, and the present moment may be completely forgotten. It can't go this fast. It just can't. Something has to be wrong. I don't want to die, I don't want to miss out on so much life or be unable to remember it. I don't want to find myself on my deathbed someday way sooner than I think and be unable to string together any kind of coherent thread from my memories. What is it all for? It has to mean something right? Why am I doing anything?
I think I finally understand that love is why. I don't know much more than that. Love is real, and it's the answer. If you find love, don't take it for granted, ever. No love is perfect. Take it with all its flaws. You don't have time to bargain with it. Love like you'll never love again, love like it's your last day alive, love like it will keep you alive forever, because it will. Every year closer to death you get, you will feel the regret of all the times you did not follow your heart. Life is short. I'm finding this out entirely too late. It goes by so fast, and what you have at the end are people and memories of being loved. To be loved is to live forever. It's the thing that connects us to everything else. It's the source and the answer to everything. It makes more sense the older I get. It used to sound cheesy, but I believe it with more sincerity every day.
youtube
I'll be okay, okay
I once promised someone that I would stop self-harming. They are no longer in my life, but I kept the promise anyway. There are no new scars on my arms, or bruises on my head or face. I'm keeping this promise for myself, now.
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hey! so i hope this isn’t too creepy/nosey, but im a medical student and i was reading your possible fibromyalgia post and have a couple ideas lol. full important disclaimer that im only partly into my studies and im currently in the hypochondriac phase and also your summary was amazing but a real doc would ask way more questions, so please consult with an actual doc and take everything i say with a grain of salt! but like your symptoms aren’t nothing so i would def encourage finding a doc that you trust to do a proper exam and run some tests. also im operating under the assumption that you’re under 50 lol, bc if you’re over 50ish that’s a whole diff list of possible diagnoses.
so the thirst thing you’re talking about is often called polydipsia and is commonly associated with diabetes insipidus. that’s not the normal diabetes you think about, but happens when your body can’t regulate fluids in your body properly. id think of this if you’re also peeing a lot lol. your doc would have to do some kidney tests for that, which wouldn’t be part of the blood panel you mentioned. i’m a little skeptical that it’s hypokalemia bc that would’ve showed up on your blood test results. it could be transient electrolyte imbalances when you exercise so have one of those electrolyte packets when you exercise lol, bc it never hurts to try the easy solutions first, but chronic low potassium should’ve shown up? tho eating sweet potatoes has never hurt.
other things it could be is a lower motor neuron problem bc you mentioned twitches and muscle weakness which is typical for those. i def can’t say more without tests, but look into/get your doc to look into myasthenia gravis or LEMS and see if either of those fit. i think it’s possible bc these often also start with face/upper body symptoms, but would need way more questions/tests to know. it’s unlikely but could also be a glycogen storage disease called McArdle disease bc you describe a second wind thing when you exercise along with exercise intolerance. that’s super rare tho so it’s unlikely unless someone in your family has it/has similar symptoms.
also look into autoimmune stuff like rheumatoid arthritis, lupus, and sjögrens disease. i have way less useful info on that bc we haven’t gotten to it in class yet lol, but sjögrens looks promising bc you often get dry mouth with it, and it often goes along with rheumatoid arthritis which could explain the joint stuff possibly.
it’s also totally possible this is fibromyalgia, but i would be cautious diagnosing it bc it often comes with fatigue and cognitive stuff which you didn’t mention. it’s also more of a pain thing, and doesn’t include your twitches/dry mouth. it’s def possible, and it was def something i thought of when i saw your symptoms, but personally i would want to rule out other stuff first bc fibromyalgia is pretty vague and often a diagnosis of exclusion when other things don’t fit.
sorry for overwhelming you!! i just saw your post and was like hmmm those symptoms sound like Something. again take my advice with a big grain of salt, but i do really think it’s worth asking your doc about it and getting tests done, bc even if there aren’t cures there are def treatments to help with a bunch of this stuff. it doesn’t sound urgent, but at least from your post your symptoms don’t sound like run of the mill aches and pains. hope you figure stuff out!!
The problem with 'muscles don't work right ouchy and I am also tired' is that it's a symptom for Absolutely Everything That Can Be Wrong With The Body. Is it cancer? Is it a terrible diet and sleep schedule? Who knows!
The doctor ran a diabetes test with the blood panel and it came up negative, but I don't know if that checks for weird kinds of diabetes. (Diabetes does not run in my family until we get very old.) That test was memorable because I have stupid fragile veins that freak out and collapse at the mere sight of a needle so I had to get stabbed nine times, they didn't manage to get the middle reading at all, and in the end they resorted to just stabbing my thumb with one of those diabetes home blood test thingies and manually squeezing my blood out into a tube drop by drop.
I looked up polydipsia and I don't think I have that. I think I just prefer my mouth to be wetter than my salival glands want it to be. 🤷♀️I think most of my problems are probably not related to any rare chronic disease, but just run-of-the-mill autism making it hard to look after myself or properly notice and process my physical condition and adapt accordingly. I don't eat enough fresh foods because it's hard to plan with the very short timeframe to prepare and eat them in. I'm uncoordinated and damage my body a lot through overwork or using muscles incorrectly because autism makes it hard to keep track of those things. My mouth feels dry and my skin feels itchy and my muscles feel sore because that's what being autistic feels like. My sleep schedule is garbage because my executive function is garbage and even once I do manage to get myself into the bed I can't just "go to sleep", I pass out when I'm ready to pass out.
I'm not saying it's impossible for anything else to be going on, but I think the known factor is the simplest explanation here. It's 2:30pm and I've been putting off breakfast for five hours. Every time I go into the kitchen I get distracted by housework instead. I am very hungry. This is not behaviour that is conducive to a well-functioning body.
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Zero you mentioned hating on people who get prissy about people shipping characters they dont actively ship and it sparked a LONG burning question of mine concerning bias shipping culture in Batfam fandom. Fans who attack and complain and make a big show of hating on ‘batcest’ ships ARE SO DUCKING HYPOCRITICAL OH MY LORD. I don’t understand why it’s considered okay to ship Dick x Barbara or Barbara x Bruce, or Steph x Tim. But seen as a cardinal sin to ship Jason x Dick, or Jason x Tim or Bruce x Dick??? Especially when the only argument antishippers make is ‘that’s gross their brothers/father and son and that’s incest 😤’. I’m sorry? Did you not just post nsfw Dickbabs content? Did DC not make Steph and Tim romantic love interests? Is that not incest too? Considering the fandom classifies all of them as family, and in a lot of fan spaces and fanfics, are they not interacting and being written as a family unit? I see SO many people blog about Bruce seeing Babs as his first daughter, or being making weird headcanons on Bruce and Steph’s relationship and donning it ‘tired uncle!Bruce and weird niece!steph core’. Like you obviously see them connected to Bruce through familial ties, and yet you’re okay with them dating Dick and Tim who are legally adopted by Bruce and who are also known as his sons? The irony. The hypocrisy. The ducking mockery of it all. Personally, I don’t think the issue that antishipper have is the ‘incest’ part but rather the ‘gay’ part of it all. Game of Thrones taught me that the general public actually don’t care about fictional incest between characters as long as it’s not between two male characters. Because lord forbid the’s a couple of queers in media.
I have been talking about this many times and I have no qualms talking about it some more:
✨ IT'S NOT INCEST, YALL JUST HOMOPHOBIC ✨
The whole idea around "batcest" makes no sense. These are people who did not grow up together, aren't related and never even lived under the same roof. Incest is not a spectrum, incest means sexual intercourse with a relative within the prohibited degree of consanguinity, consanguinity means BLOOD RELATIONSHIP, and these people DO NOT HAVE IT.
But even then, they are a bunch of hypocrites because I have not ever seen anyone batting an eye over Dickbabs or Timsteph (or Jaybabs, or Timbabs - yeah depending on the time period or the media, poor Babs has been passed around a lot). Their relationship is the exact same as the boys' when it comes to shared experiences. Steph has even been a Robin. But nobody cares because 1, DC is not pushing the "family rhetoric" with the girls all that much since they treat them as lower importance characters (when they're there at all), and 2, it's not queer relationships.
And this is ultimately what makes me go insane about queer kids parroting anti bullshit. Censorship is the weapon used by bigots to criminalize, punish and ultimately erase queer people from existence, it takes to study queer history for five minutes to understand this. You can see it happening in every fandom space where every type of queer ship gets put through some sort of moral sieve, and they WILL find reasons why it's unethical to ship it. Did you know that now shipping Dick/Wally is problematic because "Wally has a wife" ? So basically they're turning the very reason why fandom was born (exploring something different from the standardized heteronormative/amatonormative way of doing everything when it comes to narrative) into something pRoBLeMaTiC.
And these little fucking idiots keep spouting queerphobic nonsense while feeling morally righteous, not understanding that they are playing the game of the same people who if they could would shoot them in the street for being anything but straight and cis. And I'm not even taking into consideration the amount of harassment that comes from antis who think bullying and suibaiting someone over the perceived honor of fictional characters is okay.
BTW it's working. Just to name one, tumblr is not even doing its little rainbow capitalism number this year, because it's not a good look to be queer friendly anymore. Antis are helping the people who want us dead get to a spot where being anything but "normal" is illegal. When it happens, and if we keep going the way that we are now it will happen, it's going to be their fault too.
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My thoughts after Chapter 7
Spoilers for Tokyo Debunker below please continue with caution:
WOWIE WAS CHAPTER 7 A GOOD ONE!!!
I can say that Mortkranken is a very interesting dorm. And I could be bias because it's a shade of a blue or blue/green I like, but it's coming my favorite.
I know I pick and push calling Jiro a slut but it was mostly based on looks alone. Now actually seeing his character in play I can finally form an opinion on these two characters.
Opinions on Yuri and Jiro :
Jiro - Looks alone he was the one who stood out to be the most, I have a type of liking either assholes or dark gloomy guys in series and seeing Jiro was the cake on top ~ I enjoy seeing him fight and work, learning about him and his illness too was a plus side and I hope to learn more about his character even if it's a side mini thing I hope he returns in the main story.
Yuri - Not gonna lie, I knew his character looks seemed familiar turns out a buddy of mine sent me a photo of him and I proceeded to call him a teal hair Azul Ashengrotto - I do not apologize. I honestly adore this man with my being. He is a bit of a gobber but he is very smart ( obviously he is a doctor). He makes me giggle a bunch so I will definitely be thinking of him.
My thoughts on chapter 7:
I was actually happy that I didn't have to wait long for the Chapter since from when I got into Tokyo Debunker for the first time. Jumping into a new chapter for the new dorm is always exciting even after all we learned in the game up till now. I knew the MC curse wouldn't be solved so easily since now there is a marking on her neck, but it was a good way to introduce Mortkranken into the story line and the characters along with it.
However with the mutated anomaly was a freaky thing itself. But it was perfect in its own way. But I wished they gave us a sprites for the zombies. After Chapter 2, the way they made one for Takeru's ghost the details and the way he moved was so chilling it made me snapped back to the thoughts this had some horror themes to it.
The anomalies in Chapter One weren't scary but they had their own sprites like the characters and they also moved too, if you look closely you can see them swaying, better view as it is looking at their hands. I kind of wished they revisited the idea of Takeru's ghost sprites / it moving to the zombies in Chapter 7. I feel like it would give the players more of an eye opener or give the player some sort of thrill chill.
I won't sit here and complain about that, we can't all have what we want to think, but I think it would have been a nice idea.
Details I liked in Chapter 7:
I will keep this one short and simple:
Finally learning the anomaly name of the one who cursed MC, Kyklos.
Zenji being Jiro's brother
Zenji name being Taro Kirisaki ( does Jiro even remember him? Someone please let me know)
How bright and colorful the lab in Mortkranken was.
Jiro <3
Jiro and Yuri's relationship <3
The tree Towa was caring for getting better but worse at the end ;-;
Towa SPEAKING AGAIN his voice is WAHHHHH✨
Also Gala is on board
ALSO WHATEVER TAIGA WAS WEARING HELLO?! SIR?!
If you read this far thank you so much!!! I'll make a separate post on my theories, I am just tired and mad that it got deleted mid-post.. I'll make a whole new post on it later it's past 3am and I wanna unwind for a bit after playing. If you wanna ask me things please direct them to my Ask/Submissions in my bio <3
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Since I have been rambling here a lot I will also ramble about my dear mdzs children
So these four are made because I joked about populating the female species in MDZS and then I made more...
Disclaimer: I am not Chinese so these names are very much like when Anime grabs random names for English characters. They don't make sense.
First RongQuan
I completely forgot what Chinese characters I grabbed for her name (something that means melting, I think?
The design idea for her is that of a simple looking woman
She became a disciple because she wanted to and her father loves her very much he used his family ties to get her in. Upon entering, it became very clear that he has absolutely no talent for cultivation. This, and the well known fact that she's here because nepotism, made her the subject of many disciples' teasing. To compensate for her lack of talent she became a push over, doing many menial tasks to contribute to the sect. She's too tired to feel mad about the treatment most of the time.
Post-canon:
She's doing the same thing she's always done. Her mother fears that being involved with a sect riddled with so much scandal might ruin her marriage prospects. She thought about agreeing with her mother for a solid minute but ultimately decided that if men can't handle being involved with her as a Jin disciple, they can't handle her at all and politely rejected to do as her mother asked.
Lan FeiRi
I also completely forgot what her name's Chinese characters are. (One of them is the character for sun, I think)
Her design idea is that of a fairy, I tried to make her hair have the silhouette of a butterfly for this. It's also why I chose something that would spell FeiRi lol
She is a child orphaned by a demonic cultivator and adopted by a Lan couple. She cultivated a little late so her cultivation isn't as good as it could've been but she's average on power, overall. She exudes nearly the same tranquil energy as Lan XiChen. This is just a facade though, she absolutely loves it when people she deems evil get the justice she thinks they deserve, she can be sadistic. The ultimate two-faced individual, she could be smiling on the outside but seething on the inside, caring on the outside but laughing out in joy over others' suffering on the inside.
Post canon:
She absolutely hates that the grandmaster of demonic cultivation is living just a few minutes away.
(she has one of my favorite designs among the mdzs ocs I made)
Nie QiaoLu
Again, I forgot what her name means.
I designed her last. I didn't know if my designs are outrageous already so this is me dialing back down. But she looked too simple with straight hair so I made it wavy.
She is the strongest female cultivator in her age group, She is a distant relative of Nie Huaisang. She used to be a quick-tempered child but when the reality of the Nie cultivation sunk in, she sought to find a way to minimize the possibility of qi deviation. Instead of finding some new techniques she found Hanguang Jun. She thought, surely, by imitating him she will be less susceptible to qi deviations and so she went ahead and lived her life with such belief. As if the natural consequence trying to imitate one of the twin jades, her social skills were stunted and she is disconnected from her emotions.
Post canon:
She came back to rejoin society and the first thing she heard was Hanguang Jun's recent marriage. Her reaction was, "Oh. Congratulations to him, I guess?" She's still unaware of the things happening around her. Someone needs to anchor her to the ground. (Her head is so empty she might just float away, never to be seen again...)
Ok. The Jiang kids I made plenty of first of all:
Yu Lilai
I do remember that her name is supposed to mean "beautiful future".
Lilai already has a whole post explaining her. She is my favorite to use of the bunch in the silly comic stuff I made because there's no stake in her. She's the kind of gag character you will see in an anime who has an eccentric yet loving and supportive family.
She's also my favorite of the bunch :3
I have no height chart for these kiddos anymore
Jiang Lian
Jiang RenJi (courtesy name)
His given name means "to unite" and the courtesy name means "sturdy foundation"
He is a distant relative of the main Jiang family. His great great grandmother left the sect to live a civilian life away from Yunmeng. He reentered the Jiang sect when he was eight because he heard about Jiang Cheng's story and felt really bad for him. He wanted to help rebuild his ancestral home.
He is the responsible and ever-so-reliable Shixiong! He is the guard dog to the sheeps that are the baby disciples. Though he lacks Lilai's talent in combat or XinXue's silver tongue, he is the person the baby disciples trust the most. A sturdy leader, fitting his name.
Xiao XinXue
You know how Wei Wuxian is abbreviated to WWX and Jiang Cheng is JC? Yeah. XinXue's name is just so it can be abbreviated to XXX. XinXue name means "new blood" I forgot what Xiao is supposed to mean though.
Her family was killed by demonic cultivators and Jiang Cheng saved her. She is also the first orphan the Jiang sect save whom they eventually took in as a disciple.
. She harbors a deep hatred for demonic cultivation and doesn't think anything is wrong with punishing them. In essence she represents the irl people who just hate Wei Wuxian and an answer to people who think demonic cultivation users are just poor unfortunate souls who had no choice.
She's wrong in some points and justified in other points. No one is telling her to let go of her anger but her friends, Lilai especially, are quick to tell her that she needs to direct that anger to the right place (and not to a man who was dead during the death of her family). She goes to RenJi to vent whenever she needs it.
(and RenJi is always there to tell Lilai that she really needs to be more gentle with her wording)
She's usually very mischievous. It's difficult to be mad at her because seeing her happy is a far cry from the catatonic girl they nursed back to consciousness. Surprisingly, she is the most nurturing of the disciples. It's an unspoken agreement that she handles the other traumatized kids they will save.
I planned to make more characters with funny abbreviations like, XD, LOL, OWO, etc but it's tiring to look for Chinese characters...
Finally, the nebulous existence of
Jiang Xie
She never had a name first, then someone asked and I had to give her a name. Then I forgot what the name was and I have no internet to look. For the first time she's gonna get referred to by name in a drawing so I just put Xie and was done with it. Then I forgot that it was Xie lol. I finally looked up Chinese characters to make names for others and I named her MiFu (overflowing blessing, something like that) then I saw the comic again where she is Xie and well Xie it is. Thankfully it could mean harmony which fit her despite her chaotic tendencies.
She was never planned to be anything beyond the first comic thingy. As someone who only watched the worst version (the anime/manhua) finding out that the temple scene is different from what really happened, especially people's outrage about it compelled me to both make something silly about it that can comfort the traumatized grape. Lol.
Then some people really liked her, I did have some not funny ideas in my head so I just drew that. Sometimes others would comment stuff that gave me ideas so I made those. In a sense she's a group effort I guess. She just developed like that. She is a joke character at her very core though. I wanted to hit a balance of funny innocent children stuff without making her just a walking ball of gags.
Ultimately she's a good kid who likes helping people by suggesting solutions only children would think of (Jin Ling has no dad? Swear brotherhood with her so they can share her dad!) It usually doesn't help but it makes the receiver of the advice feel better more often than not. Promising to break the legs of her loved ones' bullies is her love language.
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Ask Game Speed Round!!
[For the Unpopular Opinion Ask Game!!]
These are all a bunch of smaller ones I thought would be too cumbersome and spammy to post on their own... Enjoy!!
Content Warning: Long.
While I do really like Dave's character as it exists in the comic- no clue what version of Dave most of the fandom is talking about, but I don't know him- I kind of like the themes in Davesprite's character more than I do Dave's. It's another Hal situation.
Dave's character tackled a lot of things very personally relatable to me in ways I'd never seen illustrated before, but Davesprite is more interesting to think about, and seems a little more fun to write. Dave was great representation for me, as someone who grew up in a very bad home, but Davesprite just has that extra oomph with his talk of humanity and individuality. Really like that guy.
---
@lupinecalibrator
This may come across as crass, or stepping out of my own lane, but I don't think giving them either multiple sets of pronouns, neopronouns, or both actually rids them of the bigotry in their characters. Lipstick on a pig situation. It just seems like a lazy, incurious fix. Yes, trans headcanons are great, but more and more often I see people use it as a cure-all to the issues a character has, either in a Doylist or Watsonian way. Queer friendliness does not eliminate racism. If a character is a bigoted caricature of a specific group of people, then slapping on a leftist layer of paint by saying "actually they're a minority icon in this other way" doesn't actually... Get rid of the problem. It's just kind of... Tone deaf.
We see this often with Transmisogynistic Caricatures getting claimed as Gay Icons, and people just saying that because they've just claimed them as a campy gay queen, the transmisogyny has been nullified- you can't talk about it anymore, they're the real good leftist in the room, you're a killjoy, and they've defeated bigotry. Not how it works.
---
Kind of tired of how some act like her only character traits are Silly Ditzy Furry Girl. Jade is an incredibly, incredibly intelligent young girl, an excellent marksman, and so, so deeply lonely. We need to talk about Jade's chronic loneliness more.
Also, I think she's some kind of Psychotic. One of the flavors. It just feels right to me. It feels canon-adjacent. Or, at least, a textually valid way to read her character. I have a whole post about it somewhere. Mituna and Jade shaking hands on the Psychosis.
---
Taking this opportunity to defend Aranea. Some people really need to stop acting like she's worse than Vriska. We all know what Aranea did was justified. Maybe not correct, but justified. And fucking awesome to watch.
Like, look. She spent an unfathomable amount of years being shot down and ignored and belittled by people who were supposed to be her friends... Aranea had to literally pay Meenah, her own best friend, to listen to her infodump, and even then Meenah couldn't afford to give her own best friend enough respect to just listen to her talk about something she's passionate about for 5 minutes.
I need you to think to yourself, genuinely. If you spent thousands- and I mean thousands upon thousands- of years getting ignored and walked on by everyone around you, even your own friends... If you spent thousands upon thousands of years getting called boring and a doormat to your face by even your own friends... Wouldn't you go crazy, too? Wouldn't you snap? Wouldn't you want to do something drastic just to get people to look at you? Just to be seen as something other than weak and boring? Just to be seen as worth even an iota of interest, a shred of someone's time? Wouldn't you? Because I think any normal person wouldn't take thousands upon thousands of years. I don't think you would last a decade. I wouldn't either, and I'm a pretty patient person.
Y'all are just jealous you can't play billiards with planets using your mind when you're mad. That shit was so awesome.
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@searedtroutpeacharugula
This is not an Unpopular Opinion, or even an Opinion, I'm just pointing this out. Do you ever think about the fact that we hardly got any conversations between Rose and Jade? I do. This haunts me. This fucks me up so bad. We get plenty between John and Dave, and Dave and Jade, and Dave and Rose, and Rose and John, and Jade and John... But hardly anything between Rose and Jade!! This is so fucked up. We were robbed. I need to watch them hang out.
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Okay, this is less of an Unpopular Opinion, and more of an Unpopular Fact, but... Mituna doesn't just throw slurs at people. That's one of the things people jump to when they're talking about Defanging Mituna- they always say something about how he "calls people slurs every two seconds". He literally doesn't. That is legitimately not a thing he does. If you heard that before and believed it, you were literally lied to. That is straight up demonstrably not true.
Like, if you're trying to think of something Mituna does every two seconds unprompted, it's either sex jokes or apologizing. Slurs aren't a thing he just slings around casually. He said a grand total of one slur... To Meenah... And it's a fake troll slur. And then we get it defined to us... Aaaand it's the troll equivalent to "Cracker". That's it. That's the crime he's committed- calling someone a word that is immediately after defined to us as "Someone who is at the top of and benefits from the furthering of the oppressive Fuchsia-Down power structure, and the Lowbloods that help enforce it." That's the slur he used. That's what made people start declaring that "he would totally say the N Word" with full and complete confidence. Absolutely ridiculous. He's called no one else any kind of genuine slur. He just called Meenah a Wader once, and then she and Kankri got upset about it, because they are both, by definition, Waders.
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Leijon Hot Take Party Pack: If you think Nepeta shipping her friends together is fine, or even adorable, but then sneer at or get grossed out by Meulin doing the same thing, you're a hypocrite. I don't care if you say "Meulin's writing Friend Fic, though, that's weird!!" the problem with Shipping Your Friends and Writing Romantic Fanfiction Of Your Friends is at the same root.
The problem with these things isn't the presence of writing, it's the presence of, you know, shipping your friends? If you're fine with Nepeta doing it, you've gotta be fine with Meulin doing it. Be fine with both or neither. It's the same damn thing. I'm pretty sure both friend groups are fine with it, too, so it's not like this is a boundaries issue or anything. Both or neither. Pick one.
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Observation: I do think it's cool how Jane and Jake are related and have similarly opposing relationships with their gender. Jake's oft presented with Feminine themes and imagery, and Jane with Masculine themes and imagery. Very cool. Wish more people made that correlation.
---
Okay, that's all for now!! Thank you for reading, if you did. Have a nice rest of your day. :)
#homestuck#homestuck meta#homestuck analysis#alpha trolls#beforan trolls#dancestors#beta kids#beta trolls#alpha kids#dave strider#davesprite#gamzee makara#kurloz makara#jade harley#aranea serket#rose lalonde#mituna captor#nepeta leijon#meulin leijon#jane crocker#im not pdf tagging all that.#nekro.pdf#nekro.sms
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Lunar Rambles
I honestly have no idea how much is gonna be on this post. So I’m just gonna do what I do for the headcanons.
Lunar deserves more credit for taking down Eclipse. He was the one who helped Monty build Bloodmoon, knowing Eclipse was scared of him. He let Moon back out so he could continue his plan. In fact, he told Sun and Moon a bunch of information without being tricked into it (if I remember correctly). And to further prove my point, the TEAPS episode what if episode straight up proves it.
Lunar is actually very smart and I’m tired of the show treating him like he’s not. (The show did this/still does this to Sun, constantly referring to the two as the dumb one and it’s so stupid). First off, the whole Eclipse situation. Lunar was able to trick Eclipse and get out of a horrible situation. He’s also used to be very emotionally intelligent (I dunno about now, but he definitely used to be). He’s smart in his own right, just like Sun is.
Lunar’s whole thing with Nutella is sad and funny at the same time. Like in yesterday’s TEAPS episode, he was basically fighting the voices. There was no way Lu’s pupils didn’t dilate like a moth seeing a light. Also, him saying he uses the sugar high to distract himself… fair enough dude.
I’ve said this before, but I really really really want Sun and Lunar to bond more cause BOY ARE THEY SIMILAR
Lunar and Ballora’s friendship is amazing and needs to develop more. Let them be besties please 🙏 🙏🙏🙏. I just want Lunar to have more normal friendships dude is lonely. (And I love Ballora, she’s so funky. So seeing her interact with my favorite character makes me very happy.)
I want Lunar to move to Eclipse’s and Puppet’s dimension please. Unless he has an actual villain arc, then I want him to stay so Lunar x Rez happens :)
While I do miss how Lunar used to be sometimes, I fucking love how he is now and no one can convince me to hate him. It’s so cool to see the way he has developed and he’s so cool and I love him.
I never understood why everyone latched onto the MONTH PLE- joke. Like it doesn’t bother me (it did before he came back but we don’t talk about that), I just don’t understand why it’s funny.
I need Lunar to get a new body. I want tall Lunar. Please and thank you (in fact, it would be fucking hilarious if he became taller than Sun, Moon, and Solar. It would make me happy.)
I’m pretty sure I told y’all this, but Lunar is the whole reason I got into this show. I’m not joking, I saw one video with him, fell in love with him, then preceded to watch the entire show from the beginning so I could see him.
I want Lunar to have a friendship like he used to have with Solar again. Whether it be with Solar again or someone else, dude just needs someone in his life like that.
I don’t really want Lumini to become a thing again (I’ve explained this in another post, if you wanna know details) and instead I say they should just be friends.
I wanna kiss him :)
I am torn about how I feel about Lunar and Eclipse’s relationship. On one hand, I want them to have a healthy relationship and become friends or smth like that. But on the other hand, it feels like the wrong way to take it? Like (at least for now) it feels like it takes away from the whole story. Because Eclipse hurt him badly and he doesn’t deserve to be forgiven. I want Lunar to be able to heal from it without forgiving
That is the end of my rambles (for now). Into my cave I go. :D
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News for Gamers
So the most notable recent gaming news is that there’s going to be a whole lot less gaming news going forward. Which to most of you is probably a massive win. See, IGN announced that they’ve bought roundabout half of the remaining industry that isn’t IGN, and with online news also dying a slow death due to the approaching new wave of journalism called “absolutely nothing”, I can’t imagine IGN and its newly acquired subsidiaries are long for this world.
Not too long ago, I was studying some magazines for my Alan Wake development history categorization project (please don’t ask), and reading the articles in these magazines led me to a startling realisation: Holy shit! This piece of gaming news media doesn’t make me want to kill myself out of second hand embarrassment!
Many of the magazines of yesteryear typically went with the approach of “spend weeks and sometimes months researching the article, and write as concise a section as you can with the contents”. Every magazine contains at least 2 big several-page spreads of some fledgeling investigative journalist talking to a bunch of basement-dwelling nerd developers and explaining their existence to the virginal minds of the general public.
Contrast this to modern journalism which goes something like:
Pick subject
Write title
???
Publish
Using this handy guide, let’s construct an article for, oh I dunno, let’s say Kotaku.
First we pick a subject. Let’s see… a game that’s coming out in the not too distant future…Let’s go within Super Monkey Ball: Banana Rumble. Now we invent a reason to talk about it. Generally this’d be a twitter post by someone with 2 followers or something. I’ll search for the series and pick the newest tweet.
Perfect. Finally we need an entirely unrelated game series that has way more clout to attach to the title… What else features platforming and a ball form… Oh, wait. I have the perfect candidate! Thus we have our title:
Sonic-like Super Monkey Ball: Banana Rumble rumoured to have a gay protagonist
What? The contents of the article? Who cares! With the invention of this newfangled concept called “social media”, 90% of the users are content with just whining about the imagined contents of the article based on the title alone. The remaining 10% who did actually click on the article for real can be turned away by just covering the site in popups about newsletters, cookies, login prompts and AI chatbots until they get tired of clicking the X buttons. This way, we can avoid writing anything in the content field, and leave it entirely filled with lorem ipsum.
Somewhere along the way from the 2000s to now, we essentially dropped 99% of the “media” out of newsmedia. News now is basically a really shit title and nothing more. Back in the day, when newscycles were slower, most articles could feature long interviews with the developers, showing more than just shiny screenshots, but also developer intentions, hopes, backgrounds and more.
Newsmedia is the tongues that connects the audience and the developers in the great french kiss of marketing video games. Marketing departments generally hold up the flashiest part of the game up for people to gawk at, but that also tells the audience very little about the game in the end, other than some sparse gameplay details. It was the job of the journalist to bring that information across to the slightly more perceptive core audiences. Now with the backing of media gone, a very crucial part of the game development process is entirely missing.
It’s easier to appreciate things when they’re gone I suppose. But at the same time, since gaming journalism is slowly dying from strangling itself while also blaming everything around it for that, there is a sizable gap in the market for newer, more visceral newshounds. So who knows, maybe someone of the few people reading my blogs could make the next big internet gaming ‘zine? Because I’m pretty sure anyone here capable of stringing more than two sentences together is a more adept writer than anyone at Kotaku right now.
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I really don't want to talk about the present AO3 controversy (I have opinions, I think anyone paying attention does, but I'm so. Very. Tired. And the internet chews up tired people with opinions and spits them out for fun. So that's not happening).
HOWEVER!
I see many people out there championing Squidgeworld as an alternative to AO3. If you don't like AO3's staff or leadership and want to go somewhere else, this is actually pretty reasonable. The Squidge folks have been doing this a long time, they know what they're doing. They are a smaller team, hosting on smaller infrastructure (a dog knocked over their server once, apparently), but they seem up to the task of running an archive.
However. I also see people talking how Squidgeworld's policies are better than AO3 in various regards. And I want to address this because it's... mostly wrong. There are some differences in the TOSes, but for most of you they will be the same.
First thing, top of the list: Squidge's TOS is much smaller and vaguer than AO3's. A whole ton of rules around tagging in the TOS are just... not there. There's a bunch of information in AO3's TOS about how complaints are treated, that's all gone, any specificity about how Squidgeworld defines what they do or do not consider acceptable behavior is just... not there. In their place, we have Wheaton's Law: "Don't be a Dick". You might thing that covers it all, but a good TOS that makes it clear what is and is not allowed gives a lot of piece of mind. Nothing is worse than waking up to see that you've been given the boot because you and the mods disagreed about what the TOS meant. It sucks, you don't want that. It probably won't happen to most people, especially if you're not an asshole, but it is a thing.
The next thing in the TOS is the CSEM clause (the technical term for most of what people refer to as child pornography), and this is what I heard a lot of people talking about. I have heard people say that Squidge "actually bans child porn". However, the only difference between AO3 and Squidge's policies on CSEM (which is, to be clear, they they do not permit it) The only difference is this line: "This includes anything deemed pro-child sex or child-sex advocacy symbols." The thing is, that's subjective. A fic that involves this kind of content is not necessarily pro-child sex. Yes, even if it's RPF. And no, RPF is not CSAM. Nor is RPF CSEM, which is a broader umbrella term. At least, not under US law or US definitions, which is what both AO3 and Squidge operate under. I have done my best to get the official definitions for these things: RPF isn't covered. This has nothing to do with my opinions on RPF, it's just fact. In short, if you're upset at AO3 for not banning sexually explicit RPF containing real-life minors, Squidgeworld doesn't ban that either. Whether or not it takes down a fic with that kind of content in it is basically down moderation staff opinion on whether it might be advocating for child sex.
Now here's the juicy stuff. Squidgeworld prohibits links to any kind of fundraising... except in the case of original work. So, if you are a writer who posts original work to fic archives and wants to link your Patreon... you can do that on Squidgeworld. Just don't do it on fanfics. Or in the comments or in your profile. Standard AO3 rules everywhere else. Honestly, unless squidgeworld takes off on a scale that is frankly unlikely, this probably won't matter, but for some of you, this is a good thing, and it's worth bringing up.
Squidgeworld, unlike AO3, does not allow AI-generated fanworks. Now, I'm sure a lot of you are very happy, but this does actually present some problems: Specifically, you can't always tell AI generated and human work apart. Sure, a lot of the time it's pretty easy, but you can mask it, and sometimes the output could be confused for real writing. More importantly, real people's writing could be confused for AI writing. I could easily see fic authors being attacked with accusations that their work is AI generated, or co-written with an AI. I don't know if that will happen, but... well, some people are assholes, and fan communities are often drama-laden. It could happen.
Squidgeworld prohibits web scraping for the purpose of use with AI. AO3 basically has the same policy, and they've taken more technical measures to prevent it now that we're aware it's a thing that happens (the first time AO3 was scraped was pre-ChatGPT, people just weren't paying attention to this stuff. I imagine squidgeworld takes similar anti-scraping technical measures, although I don't know for sure). I think people don't think AO3 does this because in the post where they explained this they also said they allowed AI-generated fics, and they went on to say that they couldn't make it impossible for someone to scrape the site and feed that into a machine learning model. That's something Squidgeworld can't do either: if you really want a website scraped, that website can be scraped. This is why AO3 went on to say that archive-locking your work would make it less likely for scrapers to catch it, and that you could do that if you were concerned.
So yeah. I think broadly that these policies shake out mostly the same as they do on AO3 in terms of content. There's more vagueness and subjectivity and more things that malicious users could potentially abuse to waste staff time and attack other users, but... well, you can always submit false reports. That's a problem on AO3 too. Same as it ever was. And hey, at least there won't be any blatantly AI-generated fics over on squidgeworld. Mind, I haven't seen any in any of my fandoms anyways...
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